doych

When roaches were bugs...

I needed a wakeup "WTF" to get my brain back into creative blogging so here's my treat for you. Enjoy "Sniff Swig Puff" starring Bea Arthur and Rock Hudson. Enjoy.

Forget the BFA

Spend $800 on some real earthy schooling.

The The Rocky Mountain Hand-Made Filmmaking Camp will take a group of people for a week, throw them together into the mountains guided by an off-beat professor, shake them up and stir vigorously,and come out with a bunch of filmmakers who can make movies without cameras and properly mix chemicals while sniffing D-76.

That actually sounds like my high school.

I'm just wondering how they pin up their prints for critique. The camp's website boasts an "outdoor classroom tent for classes and discussions."

Cross-eyed Collectibles

Caught this ad on some random site. (click for larger) I swear I wasn't searching for it. I don't watch Prison Break, but I do give Wentworth Miller props for being pretty hot... although his character's 1:6 scale model has me ready to run the other way.

Mad Men

AH, to think back when our industry was driven purely by ego, money, and the phrase "sex sells." Ok so not much has changed, but we're promised to get a glimpse of Advertising's "golden age" (Madison Avenue in the '60s) in AMC's new show airing today - "Mad Men." It's created, executive produced and written by Matt Weiner (Exec Producer and writer for The Sopranos). I am intrigued, and hoping it keeps my interest for the 13 one-hour episodes. Premiers tonight at 10pm.

It's All Over Now, Baby Blue

All things must end, and as most people predicted, The Sopranos ending left us with more questions than answers. The Montclair, NJ bar buzz in is that there will be a more "final" ending in an upcoming movie.I give Chase more credit than that. Not that he cares, but I'm satisfied with the ending. My sister gave me a laugh when she called at 10:14pm to ask "Why did they show Meadow taking so long to park outside?" The answer is simply, "because David Chase can."

I've mentioned before I live only blocks away from the real Soprano house. My roommate's curiosity lead her to drive by on Sunday and she saw that fans had left bouquets of roses on the driveway entrance. Interesting.

I won't sit here and try to tear apart every symbol of the finale. And this is where I insert that no series ending will EVER match that of "Six Feet Under" but I will note some thoughts that are still haunting me 24 hours later. The more I think about the final episode, the more I fine tune my theory that he could have shot that in any sequence, so that the actors would not know how it ended either. Sort of Woody Allen style where one character wouldn't know how another character acted in a previous scene. Just a thought.

But what I found to be the strongest point was the development of Tony's son. We witnessed beautiful writing depicting young ears first hearing musical genius -  how appropriate that AJ begins his climatic "turning point" after he's introduced to the words of Bob Dylan.

The young Soprano's political passions that ruled the season were soon thereafter smothered by his parents' blanket of wealth and selfishness to keep him safe. Their fear of his military wishes are paralleled with the fact he almost killed himself in an earlier scene by recklessly parking his hot cadilic converter on a pile of leaves. No need to mention the suicide attempt three weeks ago. I noted the Dylan song they played, "It's Alright, Ma (I'm Only Bleeding)" contains the perfect lyrics to summarize the second, and almost stronger meaning of the episode's title: "Made in America."

Coming Soon to a treadmill near me

I've decided to pay for pain. February 1st was the first time I've ever joined a gym. March 1st came around and I still had not stepped one foot into the gym. On March 15 I decided to hire a personal trainer to force me to get my ass to the gym, and have someone bark at me twice a week.

I find it funny that the best priced training package per hour at New York Sports Club is called "Wedding Ready." The club assumes that since you've committed to another human being for the rest of your life, you're willing to commit to two days a week for 12 weeks. I can do this. The 12 weeks, that is. Not the lifetime part. Anyone can buy the package - I actually think it's a great marketing call to get those brides down a dress size or two.

Here's another great marketing plan - NYSC is the Official Health Club of the 2007 Tribeca Film Festival - and they're bringing the movie shorts to the cardio machine screens from April 25 to May 5. Yay! I'm actually excited for this.

My legs are hoping there won't be 10 minutes of advertisements.

You can't always get the tattoo you want

I'm an addicted Sopranos fan. I have to be. The real Sopranos' house is four blocks from mine, and the location scouts always pick places I'm familiar with - right up to the Johnnycakes that were served across the street from my last agency. And of course, 78 episodes later, I still feel secure I'll find great writing and acting.

I am one to look for editing details, but I'm not one to stare at women's breasts. In the case of Janice Soprano, you can't help but notice them. What I noticed last night during the long awaited season premier, is Janice's boob appeared to be... not quite the same as the previous seasons.

It's that Rolling Stones tattoo we all love her for. It used to be a REAL Mick Jagger tongue sticking straight down her cleavage, in perfect logo form. Now it looks like a first-timer laid down her ink and made that tongue slightly narrower and the upper lip less full.

Yes, she shows us her breasts long enough to pick this up. All the people watching it with me agreed as I pointed it out. Could it be that the Rolling Stones demanded payment for the rights to use it? Could HBO have demanded money for product placement?

I wouldn't be surprised. The alcoholic fans watching with me pointed out something I've never noticed. All previous outdoor Soprano gatherings have included only Budweiser beer. Take note in a boat scene with Bobby and Tony - Bobby wishes his wife was as hot as his Heineken.

Thank you, come again!

7-Eleven will soon cater to the real life Homer Simpsons in light of The Simpsons Movie due out in July.

It sounds like there may still be final ink to lay down on the deal, but 7-Eleven plans to refit 11 stores across the US to resemble the front of Kwik-E-Mart, the convenience store in The Simpsons cartoon. They'll supposedly offer product based on the cartoon items - Buzz Cola, KrustyO's cereal and even iced Squishees (still containing the original Slurpee).

McDonald's missed the boat. Forget the Lion King action figures. Imagine promoting Pulp Fiction: Simply rename the Quarter Pounder to the Royale With Cheese, and have all the employees hand it over yelling "Here's your Mother F**kin Burger!"

And don't forget the signage in the windows:
"Hamburgers. The cornerstone of any nutritious breakfast."

The Violence of the Lambs

I thought 300 Spartans going to war was bad-ass, but now here's over 30 million baaaaad-ass bloodthirsty killer sheep- products of a reckless genetic engineering experiment that goes horribly wrong.

Black Sheep is coming soon to theaters in New Zealand.

Damn.

Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto

I caught the newly edited version of the GM robot spot this weekend - can't remember what time slot - maybe during the Knicks' usual 4th quarter beating, but I'm sure it's now "safe" for kids to watch.

Most of us (ad peeps) have heard by now that the suicide ending depicted in the Super Bowl spot was criticized by the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, which had demanded that the ad be pulled and that GM issue an apology.

I'm wondering if it's from the post-game uproar or simply crappy/depressing weather season - In the past few weeks, every time I've been in my car I've heard an ad or two for a suicide helpline. And I'm a chronic station changer since NY radio sucks.

I guess it's not at all politically correct for those ads to attempt some cheering up with "Need a Moment? Try a Snickers!"

Anticipating 300

I'm actually excited to see how Director Zack Snyder depicts the ferocious Battle of Thermopylae as channeled through the imagination of graphic novelist Frank Miller. I'm typically one to favor a drama over classic war scenes, but I should have known once I saw previews for 300, that the eerie, dark, beautiful Matt Mahurin-esque style was created from the same mind that created Sin City.

300 (at this writing) has a full 100% Critic's Tomatometer rating on Rotten Tomatoes - a rare review score within their extensive movie database.

The movie opens March 9 - and if all 300 Spartans are sporting the same abs as depicted here, I may have to see it on opening day.

Buddhism is their philosophy. Soccer is their religion.

Another weekend being sick for me is another weekend to catch up on some movies. I was lucky to catch a film called The Cup on one of the Sundance channels. It's about a group of monks obsessed with the World Cup soccer final.

The film, also known as Phörpa, brings a powerful look into the day to day lives of young, energetic monks, and demonstrates the challenges a spiritual leader faces in a modern world. The main character, Orgyen, leads the soccer enthusiasm as he rallies the monks to chip in and rent a TV for the late night live broadcast.

It is a beautiful, semi-autobiographical tale from director Khyentse Norbu.

Shot in a Tibetan refugee colony in the Himalayan foothills of northern India, The Cup was made with a cast and crew of mostly monks and novices. The average scene required only three takes, which Khyentse Norbu attributed to their powers of meditation.

While digging for more info on the director, I came across this tidbit - Khyentse Norbu is also known as His Eminence Dzongsar Jamyang Khyentse Rinpoche, the reincarnation of a 19th century Tibetan saint and one of Himalayan Buddhism's most revered lamas. Besides being one of the most important incarnate lamas in the Tibetan Buddhist tradition, he is a member of one of Bhutan’s most noble families. Born in a remote area of eastern Bhutan in the Year of the Metal Ox (1961), he is the son of contemporary Buddhist master Thinley Norbu Rinpoche, and grandson of both tantric yogi Lama Sonam Zangpo and H.H. Dudjom Rinpoche.

Khyentse Norbu consulted mo, an ancient divination system involving dice and beads, to make decisions about casting and shooting schedules. 

He was also careful to assure his Tibetan actors that they wouldn't suffer karmic retribution if the script called for them to rough up a monk for making too much noise during France vs. Brazil.

Who needs Janet's boob when we have Prince's "symbol"

Prince, your Super Bowl half time show was brilliant, as expected. Perfect song list. Awesome set design. The marching band was slammin' to the beat, and the crowd - in person and at home - was genuinely in to it. We were all impressed that the Twinz didn't miss a step in 6 inch heels and pouring rain.

We were even more impressed with the size of your symbol... guitar.

Yeah, we saw you chuckle after your larger-than-life shadow display. There wasn't one adult not laughing. Austin Powers couldn't coach that any better.

Lives more ordinary.

Ok, it’s been some time since my last post. Life happens. So I’m picking back up where I Ieft off with a look at two older but still cool films. Born into this is a documentary about Charles Bukowski, the poet everyone in Hollywood wants to say they’re into just to be hip. I have to admit I never read him until after this movie, as I’d always assumed he was just another Elmore Leonard Pulp-type writer. After watching though, it’s clear that even though his hard-drinking rep preceded him, his words never got that email.

Cantankerous, horny and painfully shy, Born the film seems to reflect the man as not just a look at how life’s torments inform your art, but also a look at someone seemingly happy to pursue a life more ordinary while writing poems anyone can relate to.

Like all things hip though, eventually the cult of personality takes over and next thing you know, Sean Penn, Tom Waits and Bono are referencing your work. Speaking of, forget Bono and his current (Red) + Oprah bullshit cause marketing gigs. He’s far more cooler here when he comes to life reading selected Bukowski poems on the DVD's extras section, as is Tom Waits.

His story in ways parallels the life of Harvey Pekar in the brilliant American Splendor, another must-see for creatives into animation, storytelling and illustration. Paul Giamatti has now assumed the Richard Dreyfuss mantle: very talented but ain’t never gonna be the classic leading man. That’s not hatin, just sayin. While both films came out in 2003, American Splendor got more attention from mainstream audiences.

It’s a great look into the mind of a person you never suspected could imagine the things they do, not just because of the acting, but the actual style of the film as well. Having both the real Harvey and Paul appear as themselves on camera, then breaking down the 4th wall, this film merges a pseudo-documentary storytelling format with traditional Hollywood fiction like no other. (Borat did it as well but that film was more a moc/doc/Jackass reality show melting pot than AS is.)

Skip Hostel 12 and Saw 19. Rent these instead.

Ooo, those goody-goody Smurfs

I grew up with The Smurfs on my daily TV diet. My adoration lead me to follow this link that my friend just sent. It's a quiz, and you guessed it, called "What kind of Smurf are you?"

It's pure entertainment value for 3 minutes of your life. You'll be shown a list of Smurfs that will make you think "Oh yeah! Forgot about Snappy Smurf!"

I am proud to report I am Brainy Smurf, apparently "the only Smurf that takes everything seriously." Sounds appropriate - after the quiz I hit up Google Images to look up Snappy.

Dark side of genius

Charles Bukowski once said "Genius is the ability to say a profound thing in a simple way" - and that he did, with frank, street-level language that put his readers into his moment, in sometimes less than two lines.

This is also the same man who said "Alcohol is probably one of the greatest things to arrive upon the earth alongside of me."

I did not read Bukowski's novel Factotum, but I did catch the movie last night on cable. Note to Indy fans: Comcast digital cable allows you to rent some independent films that are currently out in theaters.

Matt Dillon brilliantly plays Henry Chinaski, the fictional alter-ego of Bukowski. Some reviews like Dillon's Chinaski better than Mickey Rourke's in Barfly. But be warned - those who do not know the works and style of Bukowski may be disturbed by a story of a man who is either drinking cheap alcohol or drunk on it from the night before as he gets fired from one meaningless job to the next. And Bukowski would be grateful if you are disturbed.

Factotum (and Bukowski's poems) offers great graphic depictions of alcoholism, but to me this doesn't equate with greatness in and of itself. It's the delivery methods of Chinaski's honesty that's brilliant. Just as fish must swim and birds must fly, Henry Chinaski has to do the things he has to do - drink, shack up with women and write. In no particular order. His needs in life are often unsatisfied by the countless menial jobs that become a cruel imposition of his time.

It's not the Leaving Las Vegas story of a purposeful downward spiral - it's a story of a man who lives life exactly the way he chooses.

I was captivated by the film. It inspired me to look up Bukowski's poems and get lost in more imagery.

I feel old

I just saw the trailer for Rocky Balboa. I'm horrified to admit I watched it, yet more frightened to admit that he looks to be in damn good shape (at least in this photo). He's a bit heavier in the movie - not to be picky.

Not only do I feel old for admitting I'm checking out the abs of a 60 year old man, but his original Rocky movie turned 30 this year. Remember seeing that one in the theater? Ouch.

But in all fairness the AARP crowd, he's only 59 in this photo.

See it first

HBO Originals. I can't live without them. Although I can do without the horrible Lisa Kudrow series and the cost of digital cable. But with The Wire, I'm hooked, and loving recent episodes more than all.

What's interesting with this season is not just the expected great writing, but HBO chose to offer each new episode a full week ahead of its scheduled air date. I know I'm late in mentioning this - I've been wondering about it for 6 weeks now, but I can't seem to let myself watch it before it's "air time" on Sunday evenings.

There's something about Sundays nights, ending a long work week - or an end of a loud football Sunday, when the tenants are finally silenced from the case of beer needed to accompany an improperly named sport - that gives me comfort in the regularly scheduled HBO Original.

Is HBO measuring who views it early? Will it increase sales of digital cable service? I doubt it.

Of course I need my On Demand for the occasional missed Sunday show, and a nice glass of wine to let me sit back, relax, and watch an astonishing display of writing, acting and storytelling.

The new potty mouth of advertising

Children -  Stop reading.
The word "ass" is safe to say on network TV. BUT (pun intended), there's a sh*tload of new TV ads that are now using the word shit - cleverly or not. It's beeped, it's thrown to a logo, it's muted. But maybe like the word "google" entering the dictionary, that bad word "shit" will soon enter teenagers' vocabulary as acceptable language. Of course only Webster and GE can determine that one.

Some of the latest sh*t out there:

Safe Shit: VW has it. At the end of the Jetta "safe" campaigns - car crashes, cut to person saying "Holy Sh.. [cut to logo]"

Fast Shit: Comcast has it. Man washes dishes in "high speed" mode, cut to woman who says "Holy Sh.." as if she's afraid her grandmother is on set.

Cell Shit: Amp'd mobile has it. Strapping young man explains all the features of his calling plan, then explains how his package comes "with all that sh..t" or maybe he says "that's a lot of sh.." or who cares since the actor is built like a sh*t brick house.

Full of Shit: Well, make that "Full of Sit." Burger King has its new Dr. Angus character claim its new Angus burger will make you sit down while exclaiming "Buns up. Buns down. I’m full of sit, you’re full of sit, we’re all full of sit.”

No matter how hard these advertisers try, there will never be anyone who says this word as well as Isiah Whitlock, Jr.  His role as Senator Clay Davis on HBO's The Wire brings us many memorable conversations in which he adds his "Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet."
It's music. I think he held one for a good 3 seconds in episode 4.

Now that's some funny shit.

Jan Švankmajer's Otesánek

Say that 5 times fast.

I watched 2 films by Luis Buñuel last week - Un Chien Andalou and Las Hurdes (Land without bread). Some would consider Buñuel the father of cinematic Surrealism, so with his films on my mind while surfing the independent channels on digital cable, I stumbled across a Czech surrealist film, Otesánek (Little Otik), by Jan Švankmajer.

Ok, here's where I admit I'm studying Surrealism for my MFA class this semester, so it's not always the norm for me to catch 1 silent and 2 subtitled movies with 48 hours... but I have to admit, I love this shit. And it keeps my roommates off the first floor. If they can't hear Joe Buck or John Madden, they stay away.   

Milos Forman once said "Disney + Buñuel = Švankmajer." That's pretty dead-on. Švankmajer's trademarks include very exaggerated sounds, often creating a very strange effect in all eating scenes. He often uses very sped-up sequences when people walk and interact. His movies often involve inanimate objects coming alive and being brought to life through his stop-motion technique.

Surrealism. Stop-motion with live action. Czech artist. An infertile couple in a poor apartment building who decide to raise a tree stump in the shape of a baby. Tree stump comes to life and eats people.

Who wouldn't give that at least a 5 minute chance?

Of course I was hooked. It's believable and yet totally outrageous. It's delightful. It's disturbing. 

Two stumps way up for this fairytale come true.

Not just another film.

Sean Penn said once that film was too important a medium to waste. And if you were going to just use it to have fun, then why not get a hooker and an eight ball and find a hotel room. Now, while I don’t share Sean’s proclivity for the latter, I do agree with his statement to the former. It’s really hard to believe in film when you see so much of what passes for it these days.

Until now.

Ashes and Snow by Gregory Colbert reinforces his point. If you’re an art director, an artist, musician, actor, filmmaker, poet, whoever you are, whatever you do, this film is not to be missed.

Stunning photography and composition, sparse soundtrack with a compelling narrative by Laurence Fishburne make this worth seeking out. (Fishburne’s read of the narrative is so good, I’d pay to hear him read the phone book.)

Maybe this movie stunned me because of the steady diet of Hollywood and so-called “independent’ films I’ve been on for so long. That by default, I couldn’t help but be amazed because this film elevates the genre to a new level when compared to the Pulp Cinema phase we seem to be in now.

Or perhaps, it just shakes off the many layers of crap the industry has built-up over the years and gets back to what filmmakers wanted film to be, but lost sight.

Film is a director’s medium. You can’t help but notice how much Colbert’s photographic experience informs this film and his decisions as a director, to the point the photography is the performance. This film feels so intimate, yet looks so epic.

Epic.

A word I hardly use anymore. How can I? I see no films designed to be that these days. Maybe some great shots are thrown in here and there, but for the most part, the genre seems lost. Hero may be the closest film I can remember of recent times that you’d have to have in the same discussion. Even still, seems like membership in the David Lean fan club is nil.

Still, no description does this work justice. Because it is epic, even on a small scale. Snow was filmed in slow-motion and finished entirely in cepia tones. It is a portrait of humans living alongside the animal kingdom. Director Gregory Colbert based this film on the international exhibitions of his large-scale prints of animals he documented over the years, told through fictionalized letters from a man on a journey.

Is it a documentary? Commentary? Work of fiction? Yes. No. Maybe. It could be all of these things, yet, it doesn’t really matter. From a cinematic POV, the opening scene rivals anything I’ve ever seen on film and lets you know that it could be all of that.

A world-class photographer, Colbert took a decade off to travel around the world to shoot. (You can also read more on his and the film’s background here.) Even the design of the main menu screen is gorgeous. Problem is, like anything this great, it’s also hard to find.

Ironic the film is about a journey, because that’s what will be required to seek it out anywhere. Hollywood Video or Blockbuster don’t list it online, not that I’d expect they would, so the only option appears to be to buy it via the film’s website here.

Just be cautioned, it’s expensive. Although it may also be the only film I’d pay $50 to own, and is certainly at home in any film collection. A nice design touch is that the DVD is also wrapped in a handmade bound cover made from a unique Nepalese paper finished with Beeswax. Once you open that, you know you’re about to experience something special.

Indeed.